Filth
by PassionateDarkness
Summary: There were so many things about her that I adored, like the wayher skin glowed as she showered off my filth. She never considered me filth, but I knew exactly what I was. {SPAWN}


Title: Filth

Author: PassionateDarkness

Paring: Spike/Dawn…hints at Spike/Buffy (not in a good way though)

Summery: Spike reflects on the summer between seasons 5 and 6 as he's burning.

A/N: I own only the obvious. The song is "Figured you Out" by Nickleback

_I like your pants around your feet  
And I like the dirt that's on your knees  
And I like the way you say please  
While you're looking up at me  
You're like my favorite damn disease_

I watched her, her body sprawled across my bed. Her dark hair is beyond my imagination, like a swirling hole of destruction. Maybe that's why I was attracted to her, because she's my destruction. My destruction and salvation all packaged into a woman's body. She's long since grown up, gotten past the tears of graves and the depth of innocence. Some say she was ripped from her childhood; I always smirk when that is always the topic of conversation. I was the only one who did the ripping.

_And I love the places that we go  
And I love the people that you know  
And I love the way you can't say "No"  
Too many long lines in a row  
I love the powder on your nose_

There were so many things about her that I adored, like the way she looked beneath me, or how her skin glowed as she showered off my filth. She never considered me filth, but I knew exactly what I was. To something so pure, I was filth.

_And now I know who you are  
It wasn't that hard  
Just to figure you out_

Wasn't pure anymore though, was she?

_Now I did, you wonder why  
I like the freckles on your chest  
And I like the way you like me best  
And I like the way you're not impressed  
While you put me to the test_

She would run out into the night, lay on the grass in front of her sister's grave. They always smelt her blood, smelt the key and the slayer packaged into one little girl. She was just seeing if I would save her, making sure that I wouldn't break the fucking promise he made to the woman I wished she was. Never tell her that though, never had to…she knew.

_I like the white stains on your dress  
I love the way you pass the check  
And I love the good times that you wreck_

I don't know why she kept coming back to me, after all the hell I put her through. It's quite a bit when I think about it. She's young, should be worrying about nail polish and hair danglies. But no, she's to busy allowing me to sink my fangs into her love. Undying, never ending fucking love. And in my own way, I guess I love her too.

_And I love your lack of self respect  
While you're passed out on the deck  
I love my hands around your neck_

We never lay together afterwards, she always gets up to take a shower and I always smoke a fag. Then we switch places, she rips the sheets from the bed and throws them in the basket that we say we'll take to the dry cleaners but we never do. We just keep on alternating, keep on spinning.

_And I know who you are  
It wasn't that hard  
Just to figure you out_

She stared at me with empty eyes, trying to figure me out…never knew I knew her better then I knew myself.

_Now I did, you wonder why  
Why not before, you never tried  
Gone for good, and this is it_

Then it all changed, and she was shoved back to her care bear pjs and another woman inhabited my bed…a woman who just happened to be her sister.

_I like your pants around your feet  
And I like the dirt that's on your knees  
And I like the way you still say please  
While you're looking up at me  
You're like my favorite damn disease_

I compared them, compared the way they squirmed and felt. The way we never talked like me and Dawn did, the way she never took a shower…she enjoyed the filth. As far as I'm concerned, she was as filthy as me.

_And I hate the places that we go  
And I hate the people that you know  
And I hate the way you can't say "No"  
Too many long lines in a row  
I hate the powder on your nose_

I convinced myself I despised her, don't let the baby in. Don't let my princess in.

_And now I know who you are  
It wasn't that hard  
Just to figure you out_

I wish I hadn't left…wished I realized how much I needed you before…

Now I did, you wonder why  
Why not before, you never tried  
Gone for good, and this is it

I hate that you're as filthy as me now…

A/n: Review!


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